thorki:

I JUST SAW A GUY AT WALMART AND HE LOOKED LIKE MORGAN FREEMAN AND HE CAUGHT ME LOOKING AT HIM AND HE POINTED AT ME AND SAID “IM NOT MORGAN FREEMAN”

(Source: thorki)

4 hours ago · 566264 · reblog

▶ Nice things to whisper when hugging someone

bagginswatson:

yogurtville:

-you smell different when you’re awake
-please help me (then smile as if nothing happened)
-soon
-you have lovely skin, I can’t wait to wear it
-your hair tastes like strawberries
-tonight….you.
-he knows, don’t go home.
-I always knew you would die in my arms
-every time I poop I think of you
-no one will ever believe you
-yessssssssssssss
-I killed mufasa
-I bet you didn’t feel me lick your ear
-mother told me it would be like this

-hail hydra

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"Combat bras"
- My guy friend trying to remember the name for sport bras (via pemsylvania)

(Source: pemsylvania)

8 hours ago · 6533 · reblog

My wish is to become so obscenely rich that I can just save people from their shitty households. Like, small child with a parent that crushes their dreams? Boom, adopted. Lose your family but don’t want to be in foster care? Boom, adopted. Hardly any younger than me but need a nontoxic environment? Boom, adopted. Give me all the orphans.

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the-real-seebs:

hussarviking:

NEVER trust an adult who won’t apologize to a child

Wow. I’d never seen it put that way, but. Wow. That is a really good piece of advice.

(Source: thunreswine)

8 hours ago · 55961 · reblog